How to Tell if Someone is Being Judgmental

Why am I being judged?  It is so frustrating to have people judging my life when they don’t have a clue about what I am going through!

judgmental

These so-called Christians should read the Bible more and stay out of my life.  Who are they to judge?  Doesn’t the Bible say, “Judge not that ye be not judged”?  I believe in God, and I talk to Jesus every day.  I am a Christian, too!  I’m probably more of a Christian because I don’t go around judging!!  God will judge me; they need to just leave me alone!!!!!

Perhaps you have thought/said/heard the above statements….

Judgmentalism.  We’ve heard the word, used the word, and seen it in action.

Let’s take an example of a judgmental attitude…

Sarah finds a boyfriend, but not everyone likes him.  Parents, church people, even her BFF tells her the guy is no good.  They don’t understand!  He makes Sarah feel special; he loves her.  She loves him!  Why can’t they see how happy she is?  Why do they try to tell her to leave him?  Why do they accuse him, and say things about him?  It breaks Sarah’s heart; she loves him!  He’s promised her to change.  Their love can survive anything!  They will work it out, and they will be happy.  People need to mind their own business.  People need to quit JUDGING!!!

Does this sound right?  Listen to Sarah’s thoughts…  SHE is saying that people are judging her.  SHE is saying that people do not want her to be happy.  SHE is saying that they do not understand.

In our make-believe story, who is it that we know FOR SURE is passing judgment?  (The answer may surprise you.)

The answer is:  Sarah!

Isn’t Sarah being critical by calling them critical?  Isn’t Sarah judging by hurling that accusation?

Isn’t Sarah making a judgment by calling others judgmental?

Do you see the problem?

When someone says I’m wrong, I am quick to scream, “Judgmental!”  When someone disapproves of my choices, I’m quick to yell, “Hypocrite!”  Could it be that I don’t understand their reasons?  Could it be that I have not walked in their shoes?

judgmental2

You are judgmental!

Could it be there is good reason for them to warn me of something they feel is dangerous?

I’m pointing a finger while saying, “Don’t point fingers at me!!!”

Judgmental.

We don’t want to hear that we are making poor choices.  We don’t want to hear that what we want is bad for us.  So, we scream it out that other people are JUDGING us!!

Oh, dear person who is accusing the world of being judgmental, who is really being judgmental?  Sarah is just a person I made up, but many real persons think they get to judge/accuse/condemn others for being judgmental.

The Sarah in this story is not real.  Yet, could it be there is someone who is being judgmental of others?  Could it be YOU?

- CL

Side Note:  Yes, people are guilty of judgmentalism at times.  We need to avoid this sin!

Still, we must understand that being judgmental does not mean someone cannot say an issue is right or wrong (John 7:24).  True judgmentalism from the biblical view means that a person is hypocritical in his judgments (Matthew 7:1-5).  He is doing the very thing that he says another person is wrong for doing.

Let’s be careful not to accuse a person of being judgmental when that person might only be trying to warn us of looming danger.  Let’s be careful not to be so lustful over what we want that we hurl hateful, judgmental accusations (of being judgmental) against a person who may only want to help us!

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